Beating A Dead Mock-Horse *

I know I’m always beating the “turn your friends vegan!” drum, but, seriously, let’s turn our friends vegan. We love them, right? We want them to be as happy about their ethical choices as we are, right? We want them to know the deep, fulfilling joy that comes along with not eating our other friends, right?!
Even though I am pretty sure almost no one reading this blog is in any need of convincing that veganism is the only acceptable diet (I really do mean the only), I’m going to post more how-to-fit-veganism-into-a-regular-life content that we can all share with our poor dairy-addicted friends.

The beautiful mother and baby at 9:00 of this video makes my heart soar!

Her encouragement for mothers to remain confident in their veganism for their babies’ health is a really special thing. So many times we are more fearful of challenging the norm than the dangers that the norm poses, and that is just inappropriate! Also, it’s not very evolved of us. With our big brains, we should be always looking forward to the very best options to optimize our brief experience on this incredible planet full of the most amazing natural resources.

Gah! What a waste of a life eating and wearing and paying for the abuse of animals is! It’s so frustrating to see a perfectly clear, abundant, gloriously joyful path to life and love, and to have to convince otherwise perfectly sane people of it! Especially when the alternative they choose, and defend as “normal” (NORMAL?!?! HMMMPPFFFFh#@%$E+$u!!!!!1!), causes so much pain, suffering, disease, darkness, defensiveness, physical and emotional torment and guilt… And those are just the risks to those choosing to live that life.
I’m not even going to get into the “lives” (if what we afford them can even be called life) of animals hurt by non-vegan humans. Let’s just talk about human people. Let’s just talk about why veganism is the only way for humans to live because it, plain and simple, benefits them the most.

 

 

* Plz don’t beat any horses. Faux or otherwise. Do go vegan though.

Alligators and Crocodiles, Oh My!

I do a lot of different things in my jobs, but my primary task is, typically, animal handling.
And I’m crazy freaking good at it, you guys.
It kind of bums me out how good I am at it; The skills I use for safely getting horrified animals to do what I need in order to medically treat them are the same types of skills that people use for getting horrified animals into slaughterhouses and research labs.

Of course I am always holding a terrified, biting dog still so we can get blood out of him to test him for heartworm disease, or inject him with Immiticide to cure his heartworm disease, or sedate him so a doctor can repair his broken leg, but to him it’s the same as if I were holding him down to skin and/or eat him alive. He fights for his life, and I am really good at making sure his efforts are futile. It’s so sad! Only you and I know I’m trying to save him, he still thinks I’m a monster.
When I am finally out of this god-awful field, I think that I might actually take up wrestling, because I think aggressive dog restraint probably has a lot of crossover with aggressive human restraint.

When explaining my weird skill set on my resume, I have to list all of the training I’ve had, the agencies that have issued my certifications, my Rabies pre-exposure vaccine status; a friend and I joked that it would be a lot simpler just to go get a crocodile handling certification and just paste it to the skills portion of my resume.

“How are your feral cat wrangling skills?”
“Pretty awesome, I’m a certified crocodile wrangler!”

You see the point/joke, right?
Eh. The moral is on its way…

Because I really do even crack jokes on my resume (seriously), in researching crocodile handling training, I learned that crocodile handlers are, much like most aggressive dog handlers, just a club of douchebags.
Turns out, and shouldn’t really be too much of a shock, most people who are willing to teach you to safely handle an alligator or a crocodile, I was very sad to learn, are complete cowboys who pretend they know something you don’t, just because they dropped out of the 8th grade to go out and make a career of poking at wild animals in swamps.

Steve Irwins these dudes ain’t.
Not even Steve-Os, really. (Steve-O is actually a really awesome dude!)

I guess the real moral is that captivity always sucks. Holding gators and crocs in cement pools is no more humane than when SeaWorld does it to whales or penguins (OMG, y’all, I think I have taken a long enough break from bitching about SeaWorld to bitch about SeaWorld some more, and I’m sure you know, things have been so bad for them lately! It’s great!).

So, as an apology to captive crocs and gators, whom I’d heretofore not considered very much, let’s check out some crocodile and gator themed stuff. Let’s appreciate their iconic power and remember that they’re suffering our lack of consideration as much as all other animals, but without the benefits of being classically cuddly lookin’ or safe to appreciate up close to enhance our sympathy for them.
And the only people who seem to want to be anywhere near them are creeps and bullies. Our giant, scaly bros need a higher quality fan club! Here, I’ll start: I’m going to buy an alligator necklace and talk about alligators more.

Screen shot 2014-01-27 at 7.29.26 AMI’d wear any of these pretty gator necklaces, but, just like any jewelry with a whale or dolphin on it, it can be hard to find a piece that doesn’t look like the carcass of an animal has just been poached.

And this little guy takes my crocs-are-cute-friends concept to the next level!

Make gator cookies!

Or rock this cute gator wallet.

Check out this awesome, heavy-duty, COLD WEATHER gator hoodie!

A post to share with your omnivorous friends (if you want to upset them).

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A poodle?! Who would eat a poodle?! You’re sick, man! Sick. Ya hear me?!

black sheep poodle - now

Oh.
I see what you did.
Yeah, now it’s food. Whew. I thought you were a sicko for a second, or something.
He’s not a baby though. I hear they taste the best when they’re babies.

 

(You can’t hear it, but I just threw up in my mouth a little.)

photo is property of C.O.K.

Please tell the Weld County, Colorado D.A.: Reporting cruelty isn’t a crime! (video)

Please sign this petition addressed to Ken Buck, the DA in Weld County brining these batshit charges against Taylor Radig.

If you don’t (or do) know who Taylor Radig is, check out Will Potter’s great new interview with her over at Green is the New Red (which you should follow, if you don’t, which I’m sure you do).

Taylor was arrested in an act of whistleblower victimization when she reported cruelty and abuse of infant calves at a veal growing facility.

You can support Taylor and the veal calves further by throwing a few bucks the way of Compassion Over Killing, whose investigations continue, despite the legal barricades Big Meat tries to throw in their way. Erica Meier is a hero and staffs her organization accordingly. COK is on its way up and I, for one, am giddy about the future and the conversations they’re creating.

National Parks Service Kills Deer in DC, Rejects Expert Opinions

My adopted hometown, Washington, DC, is typically a really, really sturdy place when it comes to animal protection.
First of all, DC is home to all of the big organizations; My first apartment in DC was on L Street, exactly one block from HSUS headquarters. Tags for admission to a private dog park are like designer jewelry for dogs. Housing cats outdoors is illegal in DC. So is verbally assaulting your pet birds. Heck, even the local animal welfare organizations in town are vegan, showing off their high profile vegan chef pals at black tie events.

But, DC, WTF, y’all?! This deer thing is just wild! Off the chain (like your dogs)!

Unwilling to accept any advice from experts on the topic of wildlife management in urban settings, the National Parks Service has decided that it will just continue to off over a hundred deer for doing nothing other than sharing their home with the government.

This is not what Rock Creek Park is for. This is not what the National Parks Service is for. This is wrong and you have to stop it, NPS.

The Washington Humane Society has wildlife experts, and not to mention the consultant of HSUS and their wildlife scientists, to approach population management without these barbarics.

Too Many To Love

Sourpuss & Mutts are property of Patrick McDonnell. This is how Sourpuss fees about being property.

My career has been about the cruelty done to animals when there are too many of them.
Over-population made pet animals absolutely valueless, and that is the struggle of animal welfare. Trying to stop the hemorrhaging of domesticated, sentient life caused by human selfishness has been my 9-5 for years.
It’s a futile fight.
For every ignorant pet owner I am able to talk into accepting a free spay or neuter, a hundred more just bred their Chihuahua to make a few extra bucks.
I don’t know the antidote for the kind of truly thoughtless arrogance that makes someone think they should sell someone else’s offspring for a profit.
Every day, about ten thousand dogs and cats are euthanized for a lack of qualified places to put them. The solution is not just ending euthanasia; Shelters fill up immediately, adoption standards must be reduced, most qualified staff members quit, animal are abused and neglected in the process. Sent to substandard homes without resources and support to help them be successful, they’re abused and neglected further before being rehomed or returned to the facility to repeat the process.
And that’s in a no-kill facility.
The path to the euthanasia room in an open-access facility can be even more direct.
Regardless of which facility they land in, about 7 dogs and cats a minute are dying at the end of their experience in human kindness and do-goodery.
And those are the ones fortunate enough to be accounted for. There are countless others without ID numbers or witnesses. They live ignored and sometimes just plain tortured by circumstance, because there are just too damn many of them.
And I still have to have beg pet owners, on my hands and knees (I’ve done this literally dozens of times, sometimes with tears), to let me coordinate a free spay or neuter for their pet, to slow some hemorrhaging.
I can’t take any more.
I can’t work for this cause anymore.
I can’t be the gentle, willing educator this cause requires anymore. I am blue in the face.
Ignorant people see the ability to cause an animal to procreate and then sell its offspring to be a right. And I am un-American in trying to take it away from them and ask them to consider should over could.
It’s a war on terror and it does not have an end.

So, I quit.
I quit animal rescue, I quit animal welfare, I quit.
They broke me, momma. The rednecks and their bustedass Chihuahuas broke me.

Over the past couple of years, I have reasoned myself into a position that I’ve almost dreaded since I first saw it on the horizon; I oppose domesticated pets.
I know.
I’m sorry.
I don’t want to.
And I say this with the perfect little butterbean toes of my cat, Tobzilla, pressed up against my hip, as he twitches and flicks his whiskers in his sleep.

I’m heartbroken for every puppy and kitten I see. My stomach turns when I think of all the different homes and unkindnesses a kitty will see before he meets the end of a natural lifespan.

I recently tried to re-read Black Beauty. If you’ve never read the book or seen one of the movies, maybe you should give it a try. I couldn’t do it, but the attempt reminded me of the story from my childhood. A beautiful and loyal domesticated animal who lives a long life full of suffering and cruelty and terror. At the end of his life he finds peace with a friend from his past, but, jeezy peezy, y’all, this is a sunny, extended version of the story lived by most animals in the U.S. right now. Most animals in this country are victims of their own cuteness, only being forced into substandard lives because they amuse our very least evolved desires to squeal at baby things that cannot resist our will.
Every dog at the shelter would be lucky to escape that place with a Black Beauty ending, but we know what’s probably going to happen.

Even adopted animals are subject to so many horrors that no one criticizes. At best, they live in peace and kindness. On average they live misunderstood lives wherein they are shouted at, dragged by their necks, punished when they shit in the wrong place, and fed things that make them sick before they are euthanized for getting sick.

I just can’t be all right with it anymore. Pets don’t belong in our lousy care. I wish I felt differently, but if I’ve ever formed an expert opinion, this is it.

The ones unfortunate enough to be born into these horrible, little lives, of course, must be protected and enriched to the very best of our abilities. We have to feed them premium nutrition and support their health and enrich their environment and help them to remain stimulated.
At all costs, we have to prevent more from being born. We have to spay and neuter all pet animals and we have to resist the cuteness of puppies and kittens. Puppies and kittens are not something to covet. Old, seasoned dogs and cats with personalities and reliable behaviors have to be held up as the holy grail of pets.
Baby animals mean suffering is recent and inevitable.

napping_with_tob

As I lean back and catch his soft, gentle gaze he blinks slowly at me. I ask him, “Tob, am I your captor?”
He yawns big, and closes his eyes as he settles into a regal pose that could just as easily be contemplative, or asleep.

Even my perfect kitten prince, the love of my life and the highlight of my every day, should never have been born.
But since he was, he may as well be adored.

Jesse Saw Blackfish

Yus!

I was psyched when Aaron Paul-Pinkman talked a little promo for his buddy’s movie, Extinction Soup (still want to see that, by the way). Welp, he did me one better, and got all upset about Blackfish with the rest of us.

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The Protection Community Responds To Your Open Letter, SeaWorld

In this clip, PETA responds beautifully to SeaWorld’s multimillion dollar open letter that ran last week in major newspapers in the US.
As this clip points out, SeaWorld spends millions upon millions on improving its image and denying its blatant cruelty, but doesn’t spend a dime on efforts to reintegrate caught animals back into their families. It’s not crazytalk, it can be done. It has been done. It must be done for every wild caught cetacean in captivity.

And check out Sea Shepherd’s response to SeaWorld’s bullshit open letter last week.
2014 will be the year of the Orca, y’all!

The documentary “Blackfish” has left a desperate SeaWorld in its wake, struggling to stay afloat in a sea of bad press and criticism from the public. As performer after performer (eight total, so far) cancels their scheduled show for SeaWorld’s upcoming “Bands, Brews & BBQ” concert series due to concerns raised by the film, SeaWorld has fought back with a list of responses that they have called an open letter from SeaWorld’s “animal advocates.” While their representatives have declined to share how much money was spent putting this response out there, it is almost certain that SeaWorld spent thousands of dollars getting the letter published in eight major U.S. newspapers.

If you have read the letter, you might be finding it hard to separate fact from fiction as it is filled with SeaWorld’s spin on the captive marine mammal industry. Sea Shepherd would like to present a few counterpoints to SeaWorld’s arguments that will hopefully clear up any confusion.

SeaWorld does not capture killer whales in the wild. Due to the groundbreaking success of our research in marine mammal reproduction, we haven’t collected a killer whale from the wild in 35 years.”

While SeaWorld admits that they have two orcas in their “care” who were captured in the wild, they leave out the violent and traumatic captures that these orcas endured. Footage of a notoriously brutal orca capture in Penn Cove, a capture which tore apart a family of orcas and left some dead, can be seen in “Blackfish.” Those responsible for the capture even sank the bodies of the dead whales in an effort to hide their deaths.

Tilikum’s capture took place off the coast of Iceland in 1983, when he was only 2. He was sent to SeaLand of the Pacific, before enduring a stressful transport once again to his current prison, SeaWorld Orlando.

Many of SeaWorld’s orcas were, indeed, born in captivity. Many of them are the offspring of Tilikum, who is used as SeaWorld’s breeding machine. SeaWorld’s marine mammals are often inbred, offspring of two mated members of the same family, resulting in a range of genetic abnormalities and mutations. That is the truth of SeaWorld’s “groundbreaking success” in marine mammal reproduction.

The letter also conveniently leaves out the fact that SeaWorld plans to take some of the 18 wild-caught beluga whales that the Georgia Aquarium is currently fighting so hard to get their hands on. Some of the belugas would be split between SeaWorld Orlando, San Antonio, and San Diego as well as other captive facilities. Why does SeaWorld support the captures of members of a healthy population of beluga whales from the wild, while claiming publicly that their orcas don’t come from the ocean?

“We do not separate killer whale moms and calves. SeaWorld recognizes the important bond between mother and calf. On the rare occasion that a mother killer whale cannot care for the calf herself, we have successfully hand raised and reintroduced the calf. Whales are only moved to maintain a healthy social structure.”

As you can see in “Blackfish,” SeaWorld has in fact removed calves from their mother’s side and transported them to their other parks. Just as any mother would mourn for her child, the orcas have cried out long-range vocals looking for their young, taken by SeaWorld.

Even if this is old footage, it is quite possible that SeaWorld continues this practice. They continue to breed marine mammals, including orcas. Some are transferred between facilities to breed or to perform. In the wild, orcas live in large pods, and in some populations, calves stay with their mother for their entire life.

Regardless, the way to “maintain a healthy social structure” for orcas, animals who live in matriarchal pods, is never to separate a mother from her calf.

“We give our animals restaurant-quality fish, exercise, veterinary care, mental stimulation, and the company of other members of their species.”

The “restaurant-quality fish” being served to these orcas refers to thawed dead fish, contrary to their natural hunting behavior in the wild. These fish are filled with antibiotics and vitamins to combat the effects of captivity on these often stressed, sick whales.

Wild orcas get moisture from the fish that they consume, but the frozen fish provided at SeaWorld have lost most of the moisture they once contained. So, SeaWorld feeds its orcas massive amounts of gelatin each day for hydration.

While some of these orcas may be kept with members of their species, these artificial pods are not the families that they would live with in the wild. Tilikum often remains alone, and now spends most of his time floating listlessly at the surface of his tank. He is used as a “stud” for SeaWorld’s continuous supply of captive and in-bred orcas (perversely, marine park staff masturbate males in order to collect their semen, which is used to impregnate females), and occasionally he is forced to provide the “big splash” at the end of SeaWorld’s performances. The in-breeding has led to unhealthy offspring and many babies have been stillborn.

“SeaWorld’s killer whales’ life spans are equivalent with those in the wild.”

This is a lie that SeaWorld has been feeding to the public for years. They claim “no one knows for sure how long orcas live,” a claim that has been refuted by marine biologists and orca researchers who have spent the greater part of their careers studying the lives and natural behaviors of orcas in the wild.

SeaWorld’s claim that the life spans of captive and wild orcas are comparable is shattered by the real numbers. In the wild, the average life span for males is 30 years and 50 years for females. Males can reach an estimated maximum age of 60-70 years old, and females 80-90 years old. While SeaWorld points out “five of our animals are older than 30, and one of our whales is close to 50,” this is highly unusual for orcas in captivity, including those at SeaWorld. Many die before those ages, and some even before reaching maturity.

“The killer whales in our care benefit those in the wild. We work with universities, governmental agencies and NGOs to increase the body of knowledge about and the understanding of killer whales — from their anatomy and reproductive biology to their auditory abilities.” 

SeaWorld’s “research” on their captive orcas benefitting wild orcas is a stretch, to say the least. Captive orcas are mere shells of their wild counterparts, unable even to engage in the most basic of their natural behaviors or live in their natural social groupings. The collapsed dorsal fin that you see in captive orcas is something that SeaWorld claims is also common in the wild, but in fact is rarely seen in wild orcas. It is a sign of stress, illness, injury or other conditions.

“SeaWorld is a world leader in animal rescue.The millions of people who visit our parks each year make possible SeaWorld’s world-renowned work in rescue, rehabilitation and release…We have rescued more than 23,000 animals with the goal of treating and returning them to the wild.”

While SeaWorld does rescue, rehabilitate and release ocean wildlife, this statement included in their letter is disgracefully misleading. The animals released by SeaWorld are most often manatees, sea turtles, and other animals who cannot be used as “performers” in their shows. Dolphins and whales and other animals such as sea lions rescued by SeaWorld who can be forced to perform tricks for food are kept and used as performers.

We have yet to hear conclusive findings on the actual success of SeaWorld’s rescue and release program. They do not follow up and report on the survival of the animals who have been released from their care.

In addition, according to its 2011-12 Annual Report, SeaWorld has given only $9 million dollars over the last decade toward conservation efforts. That means for every 100 dollars in revenue they bring in, they donate approximately 1 cent toward saving the animals in the wild whose captive counterparts they are exploiting. That’s .0001 percent of their income going to help animals in the wild. I think that might be the most telling point of all — that, in fact, SeaWorld is really nothing more than a money-making enterprise.

The bottom line is that SeaWorld is part of the massive machine that is the captive marine mammal industry, an industry willing to spew whatever lies it can in order to keep you spending your money at their parks. This industry is inextricably linked not only to the deaths of the animals in their tanks, but to the deaths of marine mammals brutally slaughtered in Taiji, Japan where dolphin trainers work side-by-side with dolphin killers to hand-pick those who are suitable for captivity – those who are “prettiest” and without visible scars. SeaWorld does not want you to know what “Blackfish” made so clear, and what our volunteer Cove Guardians continue to show on the ground in Taiji every day: captivity kills.

As that message spreads, a new generation is leading the way for a future of freedom for marine life. Children have begun to speak out and say that they will never spend another moment at SeaWorld or other marine parks that hold orcas and other dolphins and whales in captivity. Students have even gotten regular school trips to SeaWorld canceled.

Children may have small voices, but they also have powerful voices because they represent change. This may be the hardest hit to SeaWorld yet, as these future adults will usher in the end of support for the captive industry and a shift toward protecting marine mammals where they belong — in the wild.

santa and a baluga

(Oh, hey, you guys, join me in giving all cetaceans the surname Freeman.)

Maybe you do it for your health?

Some people, like myself, came to healthy living late. I was a vegan for about fifteen years before it occurred to me that my diet might also impact me and not just those I wasn’t eating.

This is an ad from some Canadian heart association, but it reminds me that not everyone can be brought to veganism through animal rights. We have to remember that some people just want to live more awesomely and aren’t motivated by do-goodery.

Share with your meat-eating, dairy-sucking friends. Remind them that vegans just don’t get sick like those eating standard American diets (S.A.D.). Cancer, heart disease and diabetes don’t bug us like they bug the rest of the world.
Let’s make 2014 the year all our friends dump dairy too.

Victory! No Fur Allowed in West Hollywood Stores

This is spectacular!

Life or Lunch?

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The first fur ban in the United States is going into effect in West Hollywood, California. Under the ban, if retailers do not clear fur from their shelves, they can face fines up to $800.

The Fur Information Council of America, which happens to have headquarters in West Hollywood, are unsurprisingly upset about the ban and are threatening to sue. Some retailers are welcoming the changes, though. David Malvaney, cofounder of the upscale Church Boutique, told Women’s Wear Daily“We are on board with the ban as we understand the concerns and have realized that there are many other fabrics and fibers that can easily take the place of real fur. We feel that the desire for real fur will lessen over time as more people become aware of the process to which the animals are subject, and I believe more cities will adopt a similar ordinance.”

Fur farms are very similar to factory farms in…

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